the middle of the night

[minoanmiss]

how I got here. unfiltered and unvarnished. medical procedure mentioned.

I only worked a half day today and I found it enervating. I still don't feel great. I'm way too aware of my GI tract. I got out of work in a poky awful mood and the people who love me were good to me despite that, regardless of that. WD sent me a burrito and RK and S opened my parents' Easter gift.

I haven't told my parents anything about the colonoscopy. I can't deal with threading the needle and guiding the conversation so I just didn't.

I woke up hot and agitated but slowly cooled and calmed and my worst irritation was that review of the Captain Marvel movie I wrote about.

Then I saw the news. How will I sleep now?

I want to write a post to Tumblr about it. I want to say "people who voted for Trump voted for this. I cannot and I will not throw my arms around them and hug them and invite them to dinner and spend my time and love on their rehabilitation. I don't care if they repented when they saw the true cost. They can work on themselves elsewhere."

I want to ask [redacted] if her vaunted uncle would tell TFG he was wrong. (context: she tried to convince us we should want to join hands with and sing kumbaya with ex-MAGA by citing her uncle)

And do I ever want to ask those Black men who voted for Trump if this is what they wanted.

This is the problem with being a liberal --we all keep a pet bigotry. We're like a helecopter, thousands of individual parts flying in hopefully close formation. Whereas our opponents have welded themselves to each other with a whole set of unifying bigotries. Ugh.

ETA RK came and hugged me in the middle of the night till I stopped crying, and assured me that she is with me. She is a true light in the darkness. Eventually I should manage to get a little sleep.

Comments

[ride_4ever]

3:16 AM here. I can't sleep either. Just letting you know that I hear you.

[sabotabby]

Oh, I hear you. Do I ever hear you.

[princessofgeeks]

HUGS

[mekare]

Hugs!

[lunabee34]

I'm glad you've got people there with you to love on you in person.

[lauradi7dw]

It's a tiny action for me, but I'm planning to attend the rally on the Boston Common on Saturday. (long planned, not exactly a response to the news).
https://www.embraceboston.org/1965-freedom-rally-60th-anniversary

[minoanmiss]

I am DELIGHTED you are going!

I have been thinking about my attendance at protests. Maybe I should post about that.

[lauradi7dw]

I am not great at either standing still or listening to speeches (or chants), but my hope is always that I will add to the publicized crowd numbers.
Got my raincoat ready to go...

[kore]

"Donald Trump signed an executive order to roll back the protections afforded to Americans against discrimination that has a “disparate impact” based on race, sex, or other protected characteristics and that is not otherwise justified."

Giddamn motherfucker.

He's probably scared of ppl getting angry over the economy so if he torches civil rights, that'll distract everyone! God I hate him.

[lokifan]

<3 So awful. I'm so glad you're getting support - you deserve it so much.