i am a failure

[minoanmiss]

I ended up with a pot of carbonized bits in still too thin syrup.

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Comments

[bikergeek]

STOPPIT. Please, just stop doing that to yourself. Your mother is no longer part of your life and your inner critic does not need to take her place.

You made a mistake, as we all do, because you are human. You tried to do something you hadn't done before, and it didn't go well. Clean up the pan (or replace it if it's not cleanable) and move on. Don't beat yourself up.

[bikergeek]

P.S. Have you eaten dinner? Don't make me come over there.

[minoanmiss]

hugs yu tightly I had dinner. :)

I hope I can save the pot. Those things cost $500!

[cmcmck]

White vinegar may help with the clean up.

Don't beat yourself up- all those of us who cook do these things!

[kayre]

If it comes to that, I have connections for a good discount.

[minoanmiss]

ZOMG thank you!

[kayre]

Daughter who used to work at Penzeys is now at Sur La Table. Employee discount deep enough that even with shipping we could get a good deal.

[bikergeek]

Good luck.

[full_metal_ox]

…Are you going to be okay?

[minoanmiss]

Things are looking hopeful for the pot, so things are looking hopeful for me.

[full_metal_ox]

And here we all are, not hauling you off to the woodshed or even suggesting that such a course of action would be appropriate. Try to wrap your mind around such a concept!

If you absolutely won’t feel resolution without a penalty of some sort—-and I know how that works—-count scrubbing the kitchen and utensils (hard labor) and, if it comes to that, the cost of replacing the pot (a monetary fine.)

[rachelkg]

I would not have expected you to replace the pot!

[minoanmiss]

I would have expected me to replace the pot. It's a really good pot.

[magid]

Not succeeding in a recipe is a cooking learning experience, which doesn't mean you are a failure. It means you learned more about what not to do for this type of cooking. Other than having some extra cleaning, everything is fine, no one has been harmed, it's all ok.

[princessofgeeks]

THIS

[minoanmiss]

blush Thank you for reassuring me. :)

[pameladean]

I personally am side-eyeing the recipe. Not that it wouldn't work for somebody, but I suspect missing information.

P.

[minoanmiss]

Yeah, I have some ideas for adjustments.

[full_metal_ox]

teenybuffalo: Evidence that a recipe doesn't work is still evidence and worth having.

Exactly. What you’ve done is learn a way not to make mincemeat.

(Ever watch B. Dylan Hollis, the pre-serum Steve Rogers look-alike who cooks vintage recipes (liberally sprinkled with risqué jokes) on TikTok? Although most of his results are delicious in their simplicity, he sometimes comes to the conclusion that what the &@#$% were these people thinking?

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=ddZxGG_bkHk)

[minoanmiss]

I LOVE HIM his little FACE his DICK JOKES his FIYAH

My two favorite online cooking shows feature gay adorable Steve Rogers lookalikes -- Max Miller of Tasting History looks like Freshly Retired Steve.

[full_metal_ox]

MOO JUICE! EGGIES! SUGAH! NUT JOKES!

Hollis has a way of infiltrating one’s cooking vocabulary.

Max Miller of Tasting History looks like Freshly Retired Steve.

And now I can’t unsee it.

[minoanmiss]

THOSE BIG BLUE EARNEST EYES

[oracne]

EEE!!!

[acelightning73]

I remember my mother asking me to stir the mincemeat while she did something else.It takes a LOT of stirring.

[minoanmiss]

makes a note

[full_metal_ox]

I remember my mother asking me to stir the mincemeat while she did something else.It takes a LOT of stirring.

As with risotto.

(Making sushi rice in restaurants is customarily a two-person job: the sushi chef (or the sushi rice chef, if the place is fancy enough to specialize roles to that degree) tossing the hot rice with the sugar-salt-and-vinegar seasoning while the sous-chef furiously fans it to serving temperature. If you want to try this at home, that could be a fun role to assign any kids who want to help.)

[lunabee34]

*hugs*

[teenybuffalo]

It will be OK. Evidence that a recipe doesn't work is still evidence and worth having. But I'm sorry this one didn't give satisfaction. It seemed like a good idea to me too!

[amaebi]

Do I gather correctly from what bikergeek said that your mother would berate you the way you berated yourself?

:(

Please don’t be your own unhinged abusive parent. :( Stuff happens. And the recipe sounded interesting to me, too— I didn’t read the directions, but the ingredient list was to swoon.

[armiphlage]

If the instructions for making a chair tells you to use a hammer when a screwdriver is required, you wouldn't blame the person for not making a good chair.

If you're trying to heat up heat-sensitive items, the recipe should tell you to use a double-boiler.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bain-marie

[dissectionist]

Man, if you knew the number of batches of ice cream mix that have gone straight into the trash! I make spectacular ice creams but there have been so many failures along the way while I figure out a new recipe or process. And I very recently lost four entire cups of the expensive imported-from-Belgium cocoa powder that I use, because I put the tray holding the powder too close to my smoker box while cold-smoking it in our BBQ. (As with spices, cold-smoking increases the flavor complexity of cocoa powder.) A stray ember burnt all of it to a crisp. Sigh.

So yeah, these things just happen.

[ororo]

*hugs*

Old programming is hard to get past, but I think the counterspells in these comments are all true.

You deserve kindness and compassion, including from yourself (yes, I know it's hard)

[med_cat]

It was only the first attempt at an experiment. I've no doubt you will succeed next time.

*Hugs*

[cellio]

I don't think one culinary accident makes one a failure. Just sayin'.

[oracne]

Fingers crossed for your pot. And you.